Totally harmless news, views and sneak previews about this thing thats called "life"

Monday, September 04, 2006

its just another night....

another night dawns. the fourth in a series of seven. almost there. keep going. geenrally the end of nights marks something really nce. u get a monday off after the weekend. u can plan a trip to meet a friend. go somewhere and hibernate till tuesday. life ..in that moment..is good. ive always wanted to go for a good 3-4 days to stay with one of my friends..in thi splace called southshields..up north in UK. i like the way this friends relaxes. just lazing away. watching tv. scratching his balls (no i dont like watching him do it..just would like to spend my own time doing it to myself), watching hindi television. that is my idea of a good relaxing vacation. in my case after my nights i have to really pick up pace and start studying....really hard. my exams are due in october. its the final part and all that jazz.

another thing ive noticed , when im on nights is that i write on this blogsite with increased frequency. i guess it helps to wind down between stressful shifts. but surprisingly..not one of the other 4 members have written on the site in the last 2 months. and some havent written for god knows how long. sometimes i wonder why i even bother writing. anyway..here goes.....

evry night in cardiothoracic surgery is on efilled with trepidation. reminds of the time istarted my first set of night shifts inortho at coventry. it was a big place. quite busy as well. but then with every subsequent night i started to feel more and more settled and comfortable. slowly getting confident with evry decision i make. then cardiothoracic surgery happened. its not that i dont get the subject. evrything is so closely monitored that u cant say stuff like "start the patient on some oxygen, start some fluids i will review her..".here if u ask for some fluids to be started ..they will bleep u in an hours time to tell u what the blood pressure is doing and ask what u want done next. so until u actually sort stuff out and make sure the patient is stable..there is no rest. every dayas i walk into teh hospital at 7.55 pm i feel my gut twisting and turning around on itself and my bladder wants to go right that moment...even if i have pee'd just ten minutes ago. u neevr know what lies ahead. patients deteriorate ina matter of minutes. well luckily i am slowly getting the hang of this as well. the measuring if cvp's, arterial lines, ventilation modes and all that jazz. so it isnt all that bad.

anyway its just 2 more nights after this one. i think im entitled to at least on eday when im just relaxing...no? lets see. i sure ill be too tensed up to want to relax. time will tell!

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